Just like the Mayflowers bloom in June,
look into the eyes of Capricon and discover,
within itself,
the fundamental basics of construction that define and redefine the present through the past;
the prisms that shred light into its components,
that shall point the way to bright and blight,
that is,
the fundamental idiocyncracy of the poetic journey that is life.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
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3 comments:
no more originality?
uncle,"idiosyncrasy" not "idiocyncracy" lah
OK Yingkit, here i have some constructive criticism: a lesson i learnt from creative writing class - try and cut down on words with more than 2 syllables. Read your poem aloud and you will find that the poem does not really sound good lah - poems should be lyrical.Also, your "let a hundred flowers bloom" opening makes it seem as though you are a Maoist. I'm not sure how your imagery of hundred flowers bloom logically link to poetry or life. You need to make your imagery work for you better. Also, did you mean "shed light" or "shred light"?
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